Family members were actively seeking out prospective wives to include cousins. They have very close family ties and rarely marry outside of their tribe. And someone he could see himself investing a lifetime in. Certainly I’m not someone his mother would have chosen for him, but she’s never made me feel that way. Perhaps they were just relieved he was finally getting married?
My husband made clear he wasn’t interested in an arranged marriage, but instead wanted to marry someone he chose. 🙂 Either way, this spoiled, only child now has a huge family who I love and cherish.
He can comfortably spend his Winter in a desert tent, cooking fresh meat over fahem, and brushing his teeth with a miswak. While I’m watching the Arab Ramadan shows, he’s fully invested in an episode of Daily Show or Colbert.
There’s very little about him that fits into the stereotypical ‘bedoin’ mold.
I’ve heard horror stories of cheating, abuse, and outright disrespect.
But this takes place in marriages all over the world — it’s not exclusive to the Arab man. What I do find very interesting and even a bit odd at times are those who stare.
Men are actually responsible for a woman — very different than being superior.
Not only are they responsible for us financially, but also our emotional well-being.
He’s never treated me as anything less than his equal other than when it involves finances.
But he also embraces the more positive things about the bedoin culture, such as how women should be treated.
Unfortunately there are a lot of misconceptions about how bedoin men treat their wives, and until you’re married to one, I suggest you don’t assume.
This post is my little attempt at clearing up some of the misconceptions regarding the Arab/American marriages.
Perhaps I should clarify a bit; my husband is not only an Arab, but he’s a bedoin (desert) Arab.For a woman to shed a tear and a man be the cause is shameful. Large family gatherings happened once a year during family reunion time and even that came to an abrupt halt when my grandparents died.